Wild things

I think right now, I’m reluctant to think that anything will ever work out. If it didn’t work for M and K, I don’t know that it will work for anyone. If six-year-olds in the woods suffer emotionally now, I don’t know how that will change when they become adults.

I’ve spent a lot of time over the last five or more years wondering, “Wny not me, in a relationship, right now?” But what I’ve realized is that I’m actually probably better off having not invested in another human being.

The thing is, being around other people, especially kids, makes you forget your own issues. You become transfixed in their worlds and act as they do. Everything seems magical- a redwood tree, a stick, a magic wand “glowstick” flashlight. Something makes you laugh almost every second of every day…

Like Ginger saying, “I grow my own crystals.”

Or Armance writing the address of her letter on the wrong side, not with the stamps.

Matilda opening her box of kisses- really, kisses- lipstick kissed pieces of paper, handing them out.

I guess what’s more important than being in a relationship with a boy around my age who cares about me is being in relationships with people twenty years younger who love me unconditionally. Who scream my name as I walk away as though they are my biggest fans.
Who will hold my hand, sit on my lap and listen to a story, or lend me their flashlight.