You teach what you are

is what I heard tonight at a panel, sponsored by the school district that I work for, promoting arts and education, even in these troubled times. I was inspired again today- and I feel like it's been a while. I've started to become routined into the daily grind, thinking about where I have to go more than the things that I will encounter on my way there. There will be the kid in my class with autism who yells out "Hot wings!" in the middle of a writing lesson, completely unrelated, and I will try not to laugh. The autistic kindergardener who I spend the afternoon with will finally start to learn that he can't break down when his pup-pup or stuffed animal is taken away. I have to see the little things- in a new school, overwhelmed by a new school year, instead of trying to impress everyone all of the time and have everything figured out right now. I need to teach what I am- that is, someone who crashes their bike on the sidewalk, wears a toy watch, and always smiles. Another thing I learned tonight- "The greatest ill in the world is self-hatred."