I've learned in all of my classes that the parents can affect the child's school performance by encouraging reading and holding their children accountable for their behavior. But I learned yesterday from one of the French teachers that kids like to have their "petit jardin," or their own garden at school, that they alone are cultivating. That may be why a parent who asks their first grader, "What did you do at school today?" gets the corresponding response, "Nothing." It's the child's own garden to protect, maintain, and produce. Letting other people in is hard for them.
I don't know what is better, over or under-involvement as parents. Parents who want to be let in on their children's conferences via video chat from Australia or divorced parents who don't want the other parent to meet with their child's teachers and see their school reports. Parents who haven't slept in days, parents who meet with every psychologist possible to figure out what their child needs to stay in a bilingual environment, or parents who don't know the same kid at home that the kid's teacher know at school.
I always reflect on my own experiences, wondering what I was like in first grade and what my parents heard at parent-teacher conferences. I like to think that I was doing well, reading and writing, paying attention in class, no behavioral issues. I don't remember my parents telling me otherwise, but I do remember anxiously waiting for them to arrive home from conferences so that I could hear what they had to say.
So, my question and challenge as a teacher is this: what do I want to cultivate in children's gardens, that they can learn to take autonomy over as I gradually release the responsibility? and how can I get them so excited about it that they want to go home and share what they've planted and grown with their families?
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