Well, I feel like I'm swimming across the Great Lake today. Not literally, figuratively of course. I've swum across the divide of expectation the past few days and come to the conclusion that God still loves me, and other people do to, just sometimes not in the way that I want them to.
He shows me with my roommates waking me up with Blue Bottle, flowers, and scones. Great Steps coffee for crossing the quarter-century divide. He shows me with Chloe's mom picking me up on the way to school, telling me that she mourned her 25th birthday by wearing all black, because things weren't going the way that she expected them to. He shows me with my friends donning their tackiest apparel to come and dance the night away. He shows me with knowing that my friends are planning something for me today, even though I don't know what. He shows me with having the morning to get a pedicure and start the day by taking my time and talking to my mom on the phone. He shows me by letting me have the opportunity to go to another country this summer, serving another population in some way. He shows me by my friends planning an art and coffee, "French day" in my honor, in which I can go to my favorite bakery and art store on them. He shows me by my roommates calling me their friend and sister. By my friends from Europe, my leaders from middle school youth group, the pastor of our church, remembering.
He shows me by the song, "Rocky Spine," which I've already listened to 10 times in the last 20 hours. By having my friend from preschool show up to my birthday party. By my friends on their way to Honduras leaving me a message on their way to the airport. I've gotten to the point where I know that I shouldn't be dependent on others' affirmation of me, but it still feels encouraging to have my cup overflowing with not only God's love today.
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